"I just don't have motivation right now."
"I'm too busy to exercise."
"I just hate cooking."
"Meal prepping is so boring."
"I can't stop myself from eating it."
"I have no control once I start!"
"My day was shitty so I deserve this cookie/glass of wine/6 pack of beer/giant burrito from Chipotle plus chips, Corona, and extra tacos."
Ever say one of those?
Me too. I'm not perfect. We've all said those things, but lately I am noticing when I say those statements, and I am examining the damaging effects it has on my life, my body, and my motivation.
I've been focusing on being mindful of the self-talk I do. When i say things like "I can't control myself around those Girl Scout cookies," I am literally giving myself permission to eat all of the cookies. I already told myself it wasn't possible for me to do something. I already gave myself permission to fail, so why would I ever expect to change? Why would I ever expect to learn to control myself with sweets when I keep telling myself over and over that I can't? The only reason I cannot control myself with sweets is because I told myself it isn't possible. I told myself it isn't for me. It's too hard. Maybe other people can do it but not me.
I am limiting myself with this negative self-talk.
In my "p.s. I love you" February accountability group, we've been talking about binge eating, emotional eating, snacking, eating at restaurants, and eating on weekends. I've learned that my job as a coach isn't to be the expert or the perfect one, but it is my job to just share my struggles, what's worked for me, and what I am still working on and encourage discussion amongst my challengers.
Eating is hard.
Listen, I know it's hard. There are food options all around us at all times. You used to go to the gas station to get gas, and now there are freaking mini marts with a million protein bars and candies and protein shakes and cookies and burritos. At. The. Gas. Station.
When you go to work on Friday, SOMEONE BROUGHT DONUTS IN because it's Friday and treat yo'self, right? Or it's after a holiday and someone brought in all the leftover cookies and candy from their kids.
Food is everywhere.
Eating is hard.
Being healthy is hard.
Eek, what if it wasn't? What if we flipped our mindset and said, "NO- THIS ISN'T HARD. Eating healthy is easy."
Go with me for a second here.
Every time we tell ourselves something is hard, we are literally giving ourselves permission to not do it. We are telling ourselves we are not capable of accomplishing it. That's dumb. We are smart humans that can accomplish anything we set our minds to doing. Remember when your parents and teachers told you that when you were little? Remember how you tell your children or your students that? Well, why can't you believe that for yourself as an adult. You have more skills and knowledge than a 5 year old. You need to start telling yourself you can do anything you set your mind to.
Because you can. You've done it before. You have approached hard challenges in your life and you have psyched yourself into accomplishing them.
What if we flipped our mindset when we came to ANY challenging task and said, "THIS IS EASY. I CAN DO THIS." Or at least "This is hard, but I can do hard things! When I do hard things, I get stronger! I become invincible! Eek! What if you tried that just once today?? Just once this weekend!
When I think about my life the last year and the complete 180 I have made since becoming a coach, I KNOW it was my mindset shift that has allowed for these amazing things to happen. I know it is my mindset that will allow for more amazing things to happen in my life. Ok, and action. Matching my actions to my goal. But first, MINDSET.
You know what's fun? Looking back on a post from last year. Last year I was doing a 1 mile a day streak for 100 days. As the 100th day was drawing closer, I decided to make a goal to get under 9 minutes, something I had never done before. But that sub 9 mile was always illusive because I approached the run with "I don't know if I can do this" and "This is too hard. This is not the day."
No wonder it took me so long to get it done.
SOOOOO... channel your inner 5 year old, STOP telling yourself that your life is too hard, that you're too busy, that you can't do something, that there is no time. Because when you are telling yourself those things, those are becoming your mantras. Why would your life change when you keep telling yourself over and over that you have no time? You have no time because you keep telling yourself you have no time, thus you are not finding a way to make time. Why would your life change when you keep telling yourself that meal prepping is too hard? You are letting yourself off the hook and saying it's okay for something to be hard for you and you don't have to work at it to make it easier. Why would your life change when you tell yourself that chopping veggies is boring? Have you even tried to make it more enjoyable?
This weekend, it's my goal for me my goal for YOU to listen to the negative self-talk you're doing. Catch yourself and see if you can change just even 1 negative, self-limiting thought.
And if you're like, where the F did all this masculine energy come from? Usually Jaclyn is all lovey dovey and loves to be coddled and feel like a victim and have people feel sorry for her? Yeah, here's where:
Paul and I have been doing Body Beast for the last 5 weeks, and I am becoming a STRONG BEAST. Sagi does not coddle you one bit. A year ago, I needed to be coddled. I hated Hammer and Chisel, and I hated him not saying nice things to me. This year, I am all about the tough love. I am all about the taking on hard challenges and not letting things getting in my way.
Neither approach is right. We need different approaches in different parts of our lives.
Need someone in your life to help you ATTAIN YOUR GOALS? I promise I am not so mean all the time. Sometimes we need to hear that warm, comforting voice, and sometimes we just need to be told GET YOUR ACT TOGETHER. I feel like my "no-nonsense nurturer' teacher personality is FINALLY coming out in my coaching business. Don't worry. I will match you where you are at. You need me to nurture you? I will match you. You need me to be no-nonsense with you? I will match you.
I am FREAKING EXCITED about the March Group starting March 6. More details to follow. But you better believe WE are going to rock it next month. Here's what people are saying in the Feb group: